讀后續(xù)寫中拓展策略的運(yùn)用

【要點(diǎn)釋義】

續(xù)寫段落的首句拓展

如何寫好讀后續(xù)寫在高考中博取閱卷老師的眼球獲得夢寐以求的高分？如何讓學(xué)生的

作品在高考中脫穎而出獲得高分？這是很多老師和學(xué)生一直在不懈努力的課題。那么，讀后

續(xù)寫的開頭如何寫呢？可以使用哪些寫作技能和手法？我們知道，一個(gè)好的故事開頭就好比

是一堂成功的課的導(dǎo)入，能夠迅速抓住學(xué)生和老師們的興趣，并且愿意聽下去，跟著授課老

師的思路走。一個(gè)好的故事開頭就好比是■個(gè)帶著香味十足的誘餌，誘使讀者上鉤并且饒有

趣味地看完。而一個(gè)拙劣的故事開頭，定會(huì)讓讀者大倒胃口，恢恢欲睡。"wellbegunishalf

done!”可見，寫好一個(gè)好故事的好開頭是多么的重要。那么，在時(shí)間緊迫的考場上如何寫

出靚麗的開頭呢？我們可以從語法手段和寫作涉及的內(nèi)容來探索。

【續(xù)寫段落的8種首句接話技巧】

1.用副詞顯現(xiàn)做出動(dòng)作反應(yīng)時(shí)的時(shí)間特征等

例如：

（2016.10浙江卷）Paral：Butnomorehelicopterscameanditwasgettingdarkagain.

Immediately,anabsolutedarknessruledtheforest.

【分析】用時(shí)間時(shí)間副詞承接所給首句中的“itgettingdarkagain”，同時(shí)銜接后文的環(huán)境描

寫“thedarknessruledtheforest”。副詞銜接自然、順暢。

2.用形容詞（短語）凸顯人物的情感情緒

例如：

（1）（2016.10浙江卷）Para1:Butnomorehelicopterscameanditwasgettingdarkagain.

Desperateandhopeless,Janekneltdown,tearsstreamingdownherface.

【分析】用形容詞短語“Desperateandhopeless”凸顯了人物的情緒狀態(tài),與后面的動(dòng)作“knelt

down”一起再現(xiàn)了情境中的人物的精神狀態(tài)。

（2）（2016.10浙江卷）Para2:ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Weakasshewas,she

struggledtoherfeet,continuingsearchingforassistance.

【分析】用“狀態(tài)形容詞+as/though引導(dǎo)的倒裝句”結(jié)構(gòu)體現(xiàn)了人物早上起來后的精神狀態(tài)。

（3）（2018.06浙江卷）Para1:Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.Afraid

thatImighthurtthelovelysmallcreature,Iautomaticallyletoutacrytostopmyhorse.

【分析】用“情緒形容詞+從句”結(jié)構(gòu)闡釋了人物見到兔子后的心理反應(yīng)。

（4）（2018.06浙江卷）Para2:Wehadnoideawherewewereanditgotdark.Exhaustedand

hungry,Iwonderedifwecouldfindourwayback.

【分析】用并列的表示心理狀態(tài)的形容詞，體現(xiàn)了人物心力交瘁的狀態(tài)。

3.用分詞（短語）體現(xiàn)人物的心理變化等

例如：

（1）（2016.10浙江卷）Paral:Butnomorehelicopterscameanditwasgettingdarkagain.

Feelingdisappointed,Janehadtostayaloneforanothernight.

【分析】用“現(xiàn)在分詞+情緒形容詞”結(jié)構(gòu)體現(xiàn)了人物失望的心理狀態(tài)。

（2）（2016.10浙江卷）Para2:ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Feelingrefreshed,she

continuedtowalkalongthestreamtofindthewayout.

【分析】用“現(xiàn)在分詞+狀態(tài)形容詞”結(jié)構(gòu)傳遞了人物早上醒來后的精神狀態(tài)。

4.用直接引語增強(qiáng)情境效果

例如：

（2017.06浙江卷）Para1:Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim."Getintothecar."Paulshouted

atMac.

【分析】用含有祈使句的直接引語與首句提示中的“abruptlystopped”形成呼應(yīng)，進(jìn)一步烘

托了緊張的情境。

5.添加背景描寫以烘托場景

例如：

（2017.11浙江卷）Para2:Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongthe

way.Ilookedoutofthecarwindow,windingrivers,loftymountains,sunnybeachesanddeep

valleysholdingmeentirelyintheirfascination.

【分析】用“視覺+環(huán)境描寫+擬人修辭”結(jié)構(gòu)與首句提示語中的“l(fā)otsofgreatsights”遙相

呼應(yīng)，再現(xiàn)了美麗風(fēng)景對視覺的沖擊效果。

6.引入新動(dòng)作創(chuàng)造新的情境

例如：

（2017.11浙江卷）Para1:Thenextdaywerememberedthebrand-newtentwehadbroughtwithus.

Dadexchangedaglancewithme.WhynotcamptosatisfyMom?

【分析】用“動(dòng)作描寫+問句銜接”結(jié)構(gòu)承接首句提示語創(chuàng)造了一個(gè)新的情境，即“露營”。

7.借助聲音效果增強(qiáng)描寫功效

例如：

BOOM,CRASH!Thewindwashowlingoutsideofmyhouse.Wewerehavingaterriblethunder

storm.Iwasveryscared.

【分析】用“howling”這一聲效進(jìn)一步拓展了首句所設(shè)定的情境效果。

8.用疑問句引出新的話題或?qū)κ录男碌目捶?/p>

例如：

Whydoestroublealwaysfollowmearound?DoIhavea“kickme”sigoonmybackor

something?

【分析】用一般疑問句承接首句的特殊疑問句，進(jìn)一步凸顯了作者對“trouble”的看法。

故事沖突的預(yù)設(shè)與解決

讀后續(xù)寫首先力爭讀懂原文，找出記敘文的幾要素，找到故事情節(jié)中到底有什么沖突或

問題。然后讀懂需要續(xù)寫的兩段的首句，根據(jù)首句推測故事發(fā)展的走向和兩段的大致內(nèi)容。

讀后續(xù)寫的文章屬于敘事類文體，大部分故事都是圍繞conflict（沖突）和solution（問題解

決）來運(yùn)轉(zhuǎn)的，因此矛盾沖突在敘事類讀后續(xù)寫語篇中尤為重要。矛盾沖突的解決能推動(dòng)故

事情節(jié)的發(fā)展。矛盾沖突分預(yù)設(shè)與解決技巧，可以幫助學(xué)生在基于篇章主題意義下更好地發(fā)

散思維，做到有話可說，有事可寫。同時(shí)，在學(xué)生創(chuàng)設(shè)矛盾沖突進(jìn)行續(xù)寫的過程中，可以

聯(lián)系上文已有的故事沖突，提高故事的完整性和連貫性。學(xué)生掌握了矛盾沖突的基本寫作技

巧，有利于在續(xù)寫的故事創(chuàng)作中打開思路，提高語言的綜合運(yùn)用能力。

【故事沖突的預(yù)設(shè)與解決的7個(gè)技巧】

技巧1：面對問題，人物產(chǎn)生的消極或積極情緒

【技巧舉例】

（2021年6月，浙江高考，Para.l）Thepaydayarrivedatlast!wasdelightedtofinallyget

thepaymentafterIworkedhardfortwoweeks.Onthewayhomefullofexcitement,Ithought

abouthowtomakeuseofthe"huge"sumofmoney.6<Ineededanewfootballinthefuture.9,I

whisperedtomyself.Approachingmyhouse,Inoticedmydadandmomstandingbesidetheold

truckofmyfamily,lookingsad.Itseemedasifsomethingwronghadhappened......

【分析】續(xù)寫第一段中的"Onthewayhomefullofexcitement表明了故事主人公心情非

常好，但是當(dāng)面對新的問題“mydadandmomstandingbesidetheoldtruckofmyfamily,

lookingsad”時(shí)，故事主人公內(nèi)心開始出現(xiàn)沖突與疑問，這就反映在"somethingwrong上

面。兩種心態(tài)的沖突描寫前后銜接自然、且恰到好處。

【用語儲備】

“感至U一陣”：feelaflushof...=feelawaveof...=feelafeeling/senseof...[joy（高興）,

excitement（興奮）,pride（驕傲）,anger（憤怒）,rage（狂怒）,panic（驚慌）,alarm（驚慌）,terror（恐懼）,

horror（恐懼）,fear（恐懼）,unease（不安），sorrow（悲傷）,sadness（悲傷）,grief（悲傷）,

embarrassment（尷尬）,disappointment（失望）,shame（羞愧）,guilt（愧疚）]。

例如：Shefeltawaveofpanic,butforcedherselftoleavetheroomcalmly.

她感到一陣驚慌，但是強(qiáng)迫自己鎮(zhèn)靜地離開了房間。

技巧2：面對復(fù)雜的情境，人物產(chǎn)生急迫/復(fù)雜的心理

【技巧舉例】

（2021年1月，浙江高考，Para.2）ThevideowaspostedonlinetheMondaybefore

Halloween.llookedjustlikeapumpkinheadinit.Embarrassedandalittleannoyed,Ifledtomy

room,butMomstoppedme."Youhaven'treadthecommentsyet.^^Iscrolleddownthescreenand

marveledatthestoriestheviewerssharedaboutHalloween.

【分析】續(xù)寫第二段首句提示語提供了一個(gè)新的情境，即“Thevideowaspostedonline”,

這讓故事主人公內(nèi)心沖突加劇（Embarrassedandalittleannoyed）,但當(dāng)聽力母親的話之后，

主人公開始閱讀網(wǎng)上的評論，這又將主人公引向另一情境，結(jié)果主人公內(nèi)心又起了變化

（marveled）。情境的不斷變換，加劇了故事主人公內(nèi)心的矛盾沖突的不斷變換。

【用語儲備】

（1）心里想：think/saytooneself

（2）害怕；恐'慌：withfear/panic/terror;tremble;shiver;shake;quake;tremblewithfear;be

seizedwithpanic;screamwithpanic/terror;freeze/shakewithterror

（3）生氣；‘憤怒：withrage;bered-cheekedwithrage;tremble/shakewithrage;feellikecrying

withrage;bespeechlesswithrage;beboilingwithrage

（4）興奮；激動(dòng)：withexcitement;yellwithexcitement;jumpupanddownwithexcitement;

screamwithexcitement;gowildwithexcitement

（5）悲傷；流淚：Tearsblurredone'seyes.淚水模糊了她的雙眼。/One'seyesgotmisty.一個(gè)

人的眼睛都模糊了。/One'seyesmisted/dimmedwithtears.淚眼模糊。/tearsrolldownone'seyes

/cheeks/face淚水落下

技巧3：面對他人的行為或行動(dòng)，人物展開了新的動(dòng)作/行為

【技巧舉例】

(2021年，新高考I卷，Para.2)77zetwinscarriedthebreakfastupstairsandwoketheirmother

up.Whentheirmothersawthedeliciousandperfectbreakfastinfrontofher,shewasvery

surprised.Itwasnotonlythegift,buttheloveofthechildrenforherthatmovedherverymuch.

Thetwochildrencouldfinishcookingabreakfast,whichshedidn'texpect.Thechildrensaid

loudly,“HappyMother，sDay!”Motherhuggedthemtightlyandkissedthemagainandagain.

【分析】續(xù)寫第二段中，當(dāng)雙胞胎叫醒母親(woketheirmotherup)后，母親的動(dòng)作首先有

“saw”和“wasverysurprised”,之后在雙胞胎發(fā)出節(jié)日問候“HappyMother'sDay”時(shí)，母

親的動(dòng)作有“hugged”和“kissed”。這種“動(dòng)作主動(dòng)應(yīng)對”模式在休息的故事情節(jié)沖突拓展

過程中是比較重要的，因?yàn)閯?dòng)作上的變化往往承載了人物對情節(jié)中的矛盾沖突的回應(yīng)模式及

態(tài)度。

【用語儲備】

(1)常用詞語：openone'smouth;widenone'seyes;risetoone'sfeet;jumptoone'sfeet;shoutat

thetopofone'slung;reachout(伸出手)

(2)常用句式：如：Havingpassedtheexam,hewassohappythathewasatalosswhattodo.通

過考試后，他非常高興，不知所措。

Sheopenedthegiftwithherhandsshakingslightly.她用輕微顫抖的手打開了禮物。

技巧4：人物沉浸在某一情境中，于是出現(xiàn)了新問題

【技巧舉例】

(2018年6月,浙江高考,Para.lySuddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.My

horseturnedtothelefttoavoidthelittlerabbitasIheldontightlyandtriednottofall.Thenmy

dadturnedaroundandshouted,"'Holdon!^^Allofasuddenthehorsebegantonm.Mydadtriedto

keepupbehindus.Forafewminutesmyhorsesloweddowntoatrotandthenstoppedbesidea

river.Ilookedaroundandrealizedthatwewerewayoffthetrack.

【分析】續(xù)寫第一段首句承接源語篇提供了一個(gè)新的情境，即"rabbitjumpedout",從而引

發(fā)了馬與人的一系列的避險(xiǎn)動(dòng)作，并且馬由于受驚而奔跑起來，最終將主人公帶入了另一個(gè)

困境，即“wewerewayoffthetrack”。

【用語儲備】

(1)不幸的是(unfortunately)

Butbadluckforsb,...但是某人真不走運(yùn)

Shetriedherbest,butinvain.她盡力了，但沒有成功。

(2)某人做了某事，不知道下一步該做什么。

Sbdidsth,wonderingwhattodonext.

Sbdidsth,notknowingwhattodonext.

技巧5：情況好轉(zhuǎn)或情境向好，人物突然有了一個(gè)想法

【技巧舉例】

(2020年7月，浙江高考,Para.2)Atthatverymoment,thehelicopterarrived.Myheartleaped

withjoyasIknewwewerelikelytobesaved.EUiusedpeppersprayagaintobuyusenoughtime.

Butthistimethebearbecamemorealert.Heregardeduswiththemercilessnecessityofhunger,

sowethrowallthefoodwehave.Hethenturnedawayandstarteddevouring.Aswewere

climbingtheropeladder,Elliprayedlikethousandtimestoshowthankfulnessofbeingsafeand

sound.

【分析】續(xù)寫第二段首句預(yù)設(shè)了一個(gè)新的情境“thehelicopterarrived"，于是故事主人公的心

情好轉(zhuǎn)(Myheartleapedwithjoy),并且當(dāng)再次遇到熊的攻擊時(shí)，主人公就又有了新的想法

(wethrowallthefoodwehave),這將故事的沖突與發(fā)展帶到另一個(gè)情境中；此外，當(dāng)獲救

后，主人公又開始感謝(Elliprayedlikethousandtimestoshowthankfulnessofbeingsafeand

sound)o可見，用新的想法接續(xù)“情況好轉(zhuǎn)”可以充分展現(xiàn)人物對整個(gè)事件的回應(yīng)過程中的

特寫鏡頭。

【用語儲備】

“某人突然想到...”：Itsuddenlyoccurredtosbthat...=Ithitsbthat...二Itstrucksbthat...=It

dawnedonsbthat...

技巧6：面對他人的鼓勵(lì)/激勵(lì)/幫助等，人物找到了解決辦法

【技巧舉例】

(2017年6月，浙江高考,Para.2)Afewminuteslater,theother加。cyclistsarrived.They

foundthedangeroussituation,wherethreemencircledthewolf.Mac'sfriendsalsojumpedoff

theirbicyclesandjoinedthefightwiththewolf.Moreandmorecarsstopped.Somedriverstook

outthesticksfromthecars,andsometookouttheknives,eventhegunstowardsthewolf.Inthe

meanwhile,thewolfmightfeelthepeople'sthreatsaround,soitbegantostepbackslowly.Soon,

itranawayofftheroadanddisappearedinthedistance.

【分析】續(xù)寫第二段首句提示給出了來幫忙的人(theothertwocyclistsarrived),之后又

不斷有人加入(Mac'sfriendsalsojumpedofftheirbicycles/Moreandmorecarsstopped),故事

中的人物有了一系列與狼對抗的動(dòng)作，如“circledthewolf”“tookoutthesticksfromthecars”

“tookouttheknives”等，這些將故事中人狼對峙的沖突進(jìn)一步推向高潮。

【用語儲備】

(1)鼓起勇氣(做某事):take/gather/one'scourage(todosth)

(2)毫不猶豫/選擇：withoutasecondthought/withoutdelay/withouthesitation/havingnochoice

技巧7：獲得新的成長，人物開始總結(jié)、點(diǎn)題并呼應(yīng)前文

【技巧舉例】

(2022年1月，浙江卷，Para.2)OnedayIgotwordthathewasadmittedtohospitalfora

seriousdisease.IfeltsosorrytohearthatandIthoughtIshouldvisithiminanycase.Hewasa

littlesurprisedtoseemewhenIsteppedintohiswardwithsomeflowersandfruits.Iofferedtodo

therestworkofourprojectandheinvitedmetosharemyideastoperfectit.Webegantoworkas

afineteamandfinallyfinishedourprojectontime.OurhardworkpaidoffandDr.Henderson's

wasverysatisfiedwithourwonderfulfindings.Fromthisproject,wealsolearnedthesignificance

ofteammates.Justasthesayinggoes,onepersoncangofar,butagroupofpersonscantravel

farther.

【分析】續(xù)寫第二段中主人公最后發(fā)現(xiàn)能與隊(duì)友和諧相處并最終完成了項(xiàng)目(Webeganto

workasafineteamandfinallyfinishedourprojectontime),這引發(fā)了主人公的反響，并且主

人公的這種體驗(yàn)不斷地深入(從“wealsolearnedthesignificanceofteammates”到"agroupof

personscantravelfarther")，充分展現(xiàn)了主人公內(nèi)心的矛盾沖突從不斷激化到出現(xiàn)轉(zhuǎn)機(jī)、再

到一步步迎刃而解的過程。

【用語儲備】

(1)直到……才意識到……

倒裝句：Notuntil...didsbrealize/noticethat...

強(qiáng)調(diào)句：Itwasonly...thatsbrealizedthat...

(2)表達(dá)經(jīng)歷與教訓(xùn)

WhatavaluablelessonIhavelearnedfrom...!我從...中得到了寶貴的教訓(xùn)。

Whatanunforgettableexperience!多么難忘的經(jīng)歷啊！

(3)結(jié)尾點(diǎn)題

Godhelpsthosewhohelpthemselves.天助自助者。

Everyoneisthearchitectofhisownfate.每個(gè)人都是自己命運(yùn)的建筑師。

Lifeisfulloflaughterandtears.Onlybyacceptingbothcanweenjoylife.生命就是充滿歡

笑和淚水的。只有同時(shí)接受兩者，我們才能享受生活。

Neverunderestimatethepowerofyouraction.永遠(yuǎn)不要低估你的行為的力量。

【提升練習(xí)】

1.（2024.黑龍江哈爾濱.模擬預(yù)測）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，

使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

ItwasabrightandsunnySaturdaywhenMr.Jonesmovedinnextdoor.Heisanold

gentlemanwiththick-framedglassesandawirybeard.Icouldseehismanybelongings:antique

chests,alargeandtattered（破敗的）paintingofarainforest,andboxesandboxesofoldbooks.

Thelineofmoversbringingitemsintothehousewasendless!However,therewasoneitemthat

Mr.Jonesrefusedtoletthemoverstouch.Itwascoveredinaredvelvetclothandhecarefully

carrieditinsidehimself.

Thatnight,IheardanoddnoisecomingfromMr.Jones9shouse.Itwassuchastrangenoise

thatIcouldnotsleepatall!Tomyastonishmentandanxiety,everynightthestrangesoundwould

comeup.Aftermuchconsideration,Idecidedtoinvestigatethismystery.Iwonderedwhaton

earthMr.Joneswas?Whatcouldthisstrangenoisebe?Whatcouldhebehiding?Manydoubts

alwaysechoedinmymind.

Thenextday,toconfirmmyguess,Islidintohishouse.Mr.Joneshadleftthewindowof

hisbasementunlockedandIcrawledinsidewithoutpermission.Makingseveralattempts,Imade

it!IfeltaroundthewallsforalightswitchandwhenIfinallyturnedthelighton,Iwasamazed!

Thebasementwaslikeamuseum.Thereweremanyexquisitejunglesandanimals'models

whichwereoftenseeninmuseums.Onthebookshelfweresomeacademicbooksaboutzoo

animals.Ialsonoticedsomeremainingcornsinthecomer.WhenIglancedatthetable,therewas

afirst-aidkitonit!Determinedtofindoutthetruth,IwasmakingmywayacrosstheroomwhenI

heardthatstrangenoiseagain,comingfromupstairs!Nervously,Iwalkedupthestairsasquietly

asIcouldbutthenonthelaststep...thefloorbeneathmyfootcreaked（嘎吱作口向）！Ipaused,

hopingnoonewashometohearme.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Suddenly,thedooropenedandtherestoodMr.Jonesstaringrightatme.

AndthenintheotherroomIsawit-alargecuteparrotinadelicategoldcage!

【參考范文】

Suddenly,thedooropenedandtherestoodMr.Jonesstaringrightatme.Hiseyeswerewide

withsurprise,buttherewasatwinkleofamusementinthem."Ah,mynewneighbor,“hesaid,his

voicewarmandinviting.waswonderingwhenwe'dmeet.^^Hegesturedformetofollowhim,

andIhesitantlysteppedinside.a4Iapologizefortheintrusion,1stammered,feelingabit

embarrassed.t6Iwasjust...curiousaboutthenoise.^^

Andthen,intheadjacentroom,1sawit-amagnificentparrotwithfeathersofemeraldand

gold.Itsquawkedandfluttered,thesoundechoingthroughthehouse."Thisisthemystery,9,Mr.

Jonessaid,atwinkleinhiseye."Myparrot,wholovestosingatnight.^^Reliefwashedovermeas

Irealizedthestrangenoisewasjustabird,andMr.Joneswasjustamanwithafondnessforthe

unusual.

【寫作分析】本文以Mr.Jones的神秘行為為線索，講述了作者對新鄰居的好奇和探索。Mr.

Jones在搬家時(shí)帶來了許多古董和書籍，并且有一個(gè)被紅絨布覆蓋的物品引起了作者的注意。

晚上，作者聽到了Mr.Jones家中傳來的奇怪噪音，這激發(fā)了作者的好奇心，決定去調(diào)查這

個(gè)謎團(tuán)。

【要點(diǎn)解析】1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“突然，門開了，Mr.Jones站在那里直視著我。”可知，第一段可以描

寫作者在Mr.Jones家中被逮個(gè)正著的尷尬場景，以及Mr.Jones對作者的友好反應(yīng)。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“然后，在另一個(gè)房間里我看到了它一一只在精美金籠里的大而可愛

的鸚鵡！”可知，第二段可以描寫作者在Mr.Jones家中發(fā)現(xiàn)了噪音的來源，即一只美麗的鸚

鵡。這解開了作者心中的謎團(tuán)。

2.續(xù)寫線索：被逮個(gè)正著——友好反應(yīng)——發(fā)現(xiàn)鸚鵡——噪音來源

3.詞匯激活：

行為類

①逮個(gè)正著：caughtred-handed/caughtintheact

②發(fā)現(xiàn)：discover/find

③友好反應(yīng)：friendlyresponse/warmreaction

④闖入：intrude/breakin

情緒類

①吃驚：surprise/astonishment

②尷尬的：embarrassed/awkward

③好奇的：curious/inquisitive

④寬慰：relief/comfort

［高分句型1】"Ah,mynewneighbor,9,hesaid,hisvoicewarmandinviting.（運(yùn)用了獨(dú)立主格

結(jié)構(gòu)）

【高分句型2】“Iapologizefortheintrusion,9,1stammered,feelingabitembarrassed.（運(yùn)用了現(xiàn)

在分詞作狀語）

［高分句型3】Itsquawkedandfluttered,thesoundechoingthroughthehouse.（運(yùn)用了獨(dú)立主

格結(jié)構(gòu)）

2.（2024.山東濟(jì)寧.三模）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)

成一篇完整的短文。

Centeringmyselfontheiceoftheskatingrink（溜冰場），Ipreparedformyskating

performance.Aconfidentsmilespreadacrossmyface.ThiswasthedayI'dperformmybest

skatinginayear,attemptingachallengingjumpknownastheaxel（前外一周半跳）.Myfriend

Calebyelledfromthestands,atYoucandoit,Harper!Myotherfriendscrossedtheirfingers.My

dadalsoshouted,4tYoulookbeautiful!?,

Asthemusicstarted,Iwasfullyprepared.Withagracefulcircle,spins,andabroadsmile,I

beganmyperformance.EverythingprogressedsmoothlyuntilIreachedthecrucialaxeljump.AsI

preparedtojump,suddenlyamixofexcitementandnervesfilledme.Tobefrank,Icoulddoit

whenIpracticedoff-ice,butI'donlylandediton-iceseveraltimesinmyentirelife.Mycoach

hadstrategicallyplaceditatthestartofmyroutinetoensuremylegswereattheirpeakforthis

demandingmove.

Itooktheleap,butperformedadistinctjump.Itwasamerehalf-circle,fallingshortofthe

axel'soneandahalf.Iheardmyfriendssighandsawmycoachraiseaneyebrow.

Determined,Iattemptedtheaxelagain,butfailed.Irepeatedlytriedandfailed,spendingso

muchtimeontheice.Whenmyroutineended,mydresswaswetandIwasfarbehindthebeat.

Thesilencewasdeafening,markingthemostembarrassingmomentsofmyskatingcareer.AsI

skatedaway,Icouldsensetheweightofeveryone'sstareuponme.

AsImademywaytomycoachanddad,IheardthecrowdcheeringforMarlo,acharming

eight-year-old,whowasgracefullyskatingpastme,leavingmewithanintensesensethatmy

skatingcareerhadcometoanend.

Mycoachhandedmemyskateguards,askingifIwasimprovising（即興創(chuàng)作）myroutine.

Ididn'tknowhowtoreply.Myfriendswereembarrassedforme,avoidingmyeyes.Theyseemed

todiscussmeexceptCaleb,myclosefriend.Hebroughtmehotchocolateandapologizedbefore

skatinghisownroutine.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150個(gè)左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Ifeltanurgetogohome,butmydadinsistedwewaitfortheresults.

WithdoubtIreturnedontotheskatingrinkthenextmorning.

【參考范文】

Ifeltanurgetogohome,butmydadinsistedwewaitfortheresults.Heremindedmethat

everyskaterhastheirupsanddowns,andthatifsthecouragetocontinuethatdefinesus.Despite

thedisappointment,Istayed,andwhentheresultswereannounced,Ihadplacedthird.Itwasn't

thevictoryIhadenvisioned,butitwasavictorynonetheless-atestamenttoperseveranceand

hardwork.

Withdoubt,Ireturnedontotheskatingrinkthenextmorning.Theicewascoldand

unforgiving,mirroringmyemotions.ButasIlacedupmyskates,Ifeltarenewedsenseof

determination.Istartedwiththebasics,focusingonmybalanceandthestrengthofmylegs.Each

timeIfell,Igotbackupandtriedagain.Mycoachwasthere,offeringwordsofencouragement

andtechnicaladvice.Bytheendofthesession,Iwasn'tperfect,butIwasbetter.Iknewtheroad

tomasteringtheaxelwasstilllong,butIwasreadytofacethechallengehead-on.

【寫作分析】本文是一篇讀后續(xù)寫，以人物為線索展開，講述了哈珀在溜冰場上準(zhǔn)備進(jìn)行一

場重要的滑冰表演，嘗試完成一個(gè)高難度的阿克塞爾跳。盡管在表演中多次嘗試失敗，感到

尷尬和沮喪，但在朋友和家人的鼓勵(lì)下，她決定不放棄，第二天回到溜冰場繼續(xù)練習(xí)，決心

克服挑戰(zhàn)。

【要點(diǎn)解析】1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“我有一種想要回家的沖動(dòng)，但我爸爸堅(jiān)持讓我們等待結(jié)果。”可知，第

一段可以描寫哈珀在父親的鼓勵(lì)下堅(jiān)持等待比賽結(jié)果，以及最終獲獎(jiǎng)的感受。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“帶著懷疑，第二天早晨我回到了溜冰場。”可知，第二段可以描寫哈珀

第二天回到溜冰場，盡管心中充滿懷疑，但仍然決心繼續(xù)努力，從基礎(chǔ)開始練習(xí)。

2.續(xù)寫線索：想要回家——父親鼓勵(lì)——等待結(jié)果——獲獎(jiǎng)—第二天回到溜冰場——決

心練習(xí)——從基礎(chǔ)開始——逐步提高

3.詞匯激活

行為類

①回家：gohome/retumhome

②等待：waitfor/await

③練習(xí)：practice/exercise/train

④嘗試：attempt/try/endeavor

情緒類

①失望：disappointment/letdown

②懷疑：doubt/skepticism/hesitation

③決心、：determination/resolve/decision

④激動(dòng)：excited/thrilled/elated

[高分句型1]Heremindedmethateveryskaterhastheirupsanddowns,andthatit'sthecourage

tocontinuethatdefinesus.（運(yùn)用了that引導(dǎo)的賓語從句作reminded的賓語）

[高分句型2]Istartedwiththebasics,focusingonmybalanceandthestrengthofmylegs.（運(yùn)用

了現(xiàn)在分詞短語focusingon...作狀語）

[高分句型3]Mycoachwasthere,offeringwordsofencouragementandtechnicaladvice.（運(yùn)用

了現(xiàn)在分詞作伴隨狀語）

3.（2024.江西南昌.三模）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)

成一篇完整的短文。

SamanthaandJakehadalwaysbeenclosetonature.Growingupinasmallcottagesituated

deepwithinathrivingforest,theyfoundcomfortandwonderinthebeautyofthenaturalworld.

Theirdailyadventuresincludedexploringthewoods,listeningtothebirdsong,andgazingatthe

starrynightsky.However,astheyearspassed,theycouldn'thelpbutnoticethegradualchanges

intheirbelovedforest.

BythetimeSamanthaturnedsixteenandJakewasthirteen,theybegantowitnessthe

effectsofdeforestationontheirwonderland.Thesoundofchainsaws（電鋸）andthesightoffallen

treesbecameincreasinglycommon.Thesiblingswerefeelingextremelyshockedandsadbythe

lossoftheforesttheyhadcherishedsincechildhood.

Oneday,afteraparticularlydishearteningwalkthroughthedecreasingwoods,Samantha

cameacrossabookaboutenvironmentalheroes.Theseindividualshaddevotedtheirlivesto

preservingthenaturalworld,andtheirstoriesofresilience（'恢復(fù)力）andimpactlightedaspark

withinSamantha'sheart.Shebelievedthatiftheycouldmakeadifference,socouldsheandJake.

Samanthacouldn'twaittosharehernew-foundinspirationwithherbrother.Sherushed

home,hermindfilledwithideasofhowtheycouldprotecttheirforest.Whensheexplainedher

thoughtstoJake,henoddedinagreement.ctOurforestislikefamilytous,“hesaid,“Wecan'tjust

standbyandwatchitdisappear.46

Withfirmdetermination,SamanthaandJakedecidedtotakeaction.Theybeganby

organizingtree-plantingeventsintheircommunity,enlisting（征募）thehelpoffriendsand

neighbors.Eachsaplingtheyplantedwasasymbolofhopeforthefutureoftheirforest.

Soon,theireffortsgainedfavor.Thelocalschoolsjoinedtheircause,incorporating

environmentaleducationintothecurriculumandthecommunityunitedbehindthem.Samantha

andJake'sforestrestorationprojecthadbecomeamovementthatunitedpeopleofallages.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Monthspassed,andtheonce-thinningforestbegantoshowsignsofrecovery.

Oneday,alocalnewsstationreachedouttoSamanthaandJake.

【參考范文】

Monthspassed,andtheonce-thinningforestbegantoshowsignsofrecovery.Thetreesthey

hadplantedgrewstrongerandtaller.SamanthaandJakeinitiatededucationalprograms,inviting

localschoolsandnatureenthusiaststoexploretheforestandlearnaboutitsfragileecosystem.The

morepeopleunderstoodthesignificanceoftheforest,themoretheyjoinedthecause.Thelocal

governmenttookconservationmeasures,too.Onesunnyafternoonafterseveralmonths,tears

welledupinSamantha'seyesassheturnedtoJakeandsaid,“Lookatwhatwe'veaccomplished,

Jake.Ourforestisthrivingonceagain.”

Oneday,alocalnewsstationreachedouttoSamanthaaandJake.Theywereinvitedforan

interviewtosharetheirstory,thechallengestheyfaced,andtheiradviceforyoungpeople

wantingtoprotecttheenvironment.6tIfsthepowerofunityandsharedlovefornaturethatkeep

usgoing,“Samanthasaidduringtheinterview,withJakenoddinginagreementbesideher.

SamanthaandJakehadbecometheheroesoftheirforest,provingthatdeterminationandadeep

bondtonaturecouldinspirepositivechange,abondworthprotectingforgenerationstocome.

【寫作分析】本文以Samantha和Jake保護(hù)森林為線索展開，講述了他們從小親近自然，

目睹森林遭破壞后，受環(huán)保英雄事跡啟發(fā)決定行動(dòng)起來，通過組織植樹活動(dòng)等努力讓森林逐

漸恢復(fù)的故事。

【要點(diǎn)解析】1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“幾個(gè)月過去了，曾經(jīng)逐漸稀疏的森林開始顯示出恢復(fù)的跡象。”可知，

第一段可描寫森林在他們的努力下逐漸恢復(fù)生機(jī)，以及他們開展的教育項(xiàng)目和取得的更多成

果。

②由第二段首句“有一天，當(dāng)?shù)匾患倚侣勲娨暸_聯(lián)系上了Samantha和Jake。”可知，第二

段可描寫他們接受采訪，分享經(jīng)歷和感悟，以及他們最終成為森林的英雄。

2.續(xù)寫線索：森林恢復(fù)一開展教育活動(dòng)一政府參與一接受采訪一分享故事一成為

英雄

3.詞匯激活

行為類

①開始顯示：begintoshow/starttodisplay

②邀請：invite/extendaninvitation

③點(diǎn)頭同意：nodinagreement/giveconsentbynodding

情緒類

①感動(dòng)得流淚：tearswellup/bemovedtotears

②愛：love/fondness/affection

[高分句型1]SamanthaandJakeinitiatededucationalprograms,invitinglocalschoolsandnature

enthusiaststoexploretheforestandlearnaboutitsfragileecosystem.（運(yùn)用了現(xiàn)在分詞短語作狀

語、動(dòng)詞不定式短語做目的狀語）

[高分句型2]It'sthepowerofunityandsharedlovefornaturethatkeepusgoing（運(yùn)用了強(qiáng)調(diào)句

結(jié)構(gòu)）

4.（2024.湖南長沙.模擬預(yù)測）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使

之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

Ninnygrewupwithhergrandparents.Hergrandmotherworkedasahousekeeper,andher

grandfatherwastooweaktomove.Inhiswheelchair,Grandfathertoldherstoriesaboutflowers,

princessesandsunrises.Thosestoriesalwaysendedwiththesamemessage:Asimpleactof

kindnesscreatesanendlessripple（漣漪）thatcomesbacktoyou.

Oneday,Ninnywasatthesupermarketwithhergrandmother.Theyonlyboughtthebare

minimum.tcOh!^^Ninnyjumpedwhenshespottedachocolatecake.Shepulledhergrandmother's

sleeve."Grandfather'sbirthdayisaroundthecomer!Canweplease,please,pleasehaveit?”The

oldladyeyedthechocolatecake.Therewerebeautifuldecorationsonthetopwithfancydesigns

ontheside.Pickingupthecake,Grandmothertookacloselookatthepriceandsighed,“Ninny,

wecan'taffordit.Ifs$40!”

Ninnypouted（噴嘴），tryingtoconvincehergrandmother.Yetsheknewthather

grandmotherwouldnotbend,evenifshebeggedwithherpuppyeyes.Nomatterwhat,moneydid

notgrowontrees.Ninnysighedandturnedaround.Grandmothergaveherasadsmileandturned

towardsthecashier.

Almostoutofnowhere,amanwitha50dollarbillandthechocolatecakeapproachedher

andhandedthesethingstoNinny."Havethem,dear.^^

Ninnytookacloserlookattheman.Hewasaverage.Averageface,averageclothes,and

averageeverything.Hewasjustarandomman.

ThemanbentdownandmaintainedeyecontactwithNinny.4tDoyouknowwhyI'mgiving

youthese?”Ninnyshookherhead.t4WhenIwasalittleboy,amanboughtmeachocolatecake.

HejustoverheardaconversationIhadwithmymother.Nothingelse.Hegavemesomemoney

andasmallslipofpaper.ThenheThemanreachedintohispocketandtookoutadog-eared

pieceofpaper.Lookingatthewordswritten,Ninnyworeasmileonherface,forshewasso

familiarwiththemessage.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Ninnyhuggedthedollarbill,cakeandthepieceofpapertoherchest.

Grandfather^eyeswidened,ctYouwon'tbelieveit!^^

【參考范文】

Ninnyhuggedthedollarbill,cakeandthepieceofpapertoherchest.Astheywalkedback

home,shecouldn'thelpbutreadthemessageonthepaperagainandagain:"