動作鏈構造大法高考英語讀后續寫教學課件

讀后續寫的寫作過程中，成功的動作描寫，可以交代人物的身份、地位，可以反映人物心理活動的進程，可以表現人物的性格特征。

相反，空洞、籠統的描寫會使內容缺乏生動性，使人物形象不豐滿。人物的動作或簡單，或復雜，都不是一下子就能完成的，細心觀察都能捕捉到最能體現人物特征的慢鏡頭。因此，在描寫動作時，同學們要學會細化動作，把動作過程分解成一連串細微的動作，形成動作鏈，寫出動作的連貫性，這樣才能使描寫具有畫面感，使人物更立體。舉個例子，何為構造動作鏈？我們先看一句高考樣題范文。He

stopped

thetaxi,

jumped

inwiththesuitcaseand

told

thedriver,“Gotothepolicestation,please.”這句話的意思是：他攔下了車，拿著箱子跳進了車里，然后對司機說，“請到警察局去。”

其實，這句話只是描寫了“上車”的動作，然而通過拆解，細致地展現了一個動作下的組成部分。其本質是避免簡單粗暴的使用一個動詞概括整個動作，而是用2-3個動詞組合進行描述。用一個公式進行總結以上例句，如下:上車=攔車+上車+告訴目的地再比如2017年高考真題中的一個優秀范文句子。

Shewould

getoff

thecarexcitedly,

laughing

and

dancing

around.這句話的意思是：她會興奮地下車，又笑又跳。這句講的是一個比較粗線條的媽媽，動作描寫完整地描述了這位媽媽下車時及下車后的表現，即：下車=下車+笑+跳Part

1動作三連結構（A,BandC結構）第1句：“男孩們跳入湖中嬉戲”想一想：跳入湖中，這個動作前面或后面會有哪些動作？跳入湖里嬉戲=

沖向湖邊

+

脫掉衣服

+

跳入水中

Theboys

rushed

excitedlytothelake,

tookoff

theirclothesand

jumpedinto

thewater.第2句，“她抱住兒子”想一想：抱住兒子，這個動作前面或后面會有哪些動作？

抱住兒子=

沖向前

+

蹲下

+

一把抱住She

dashed

forward,

knelt

downand

gathered

herson

into

herarms.第3句，“這個歌手唱歌”想一想：歌手唱歌，這個動作前面或后面會有哪些動作？

歌手唱歌=

掃視觀眾+

深吸一口氣+開始演唱

Thesinger

glancedat

theaudience,

took

adeepbreathandbeganto

sing.Part2非謂語結構第1個例句，“老人靜坐”老人靜坐=坐在夕陽下+

看報紙+

聽廣播第一種句子模式：-ing現在分詞,凸顯同一對象同時發生不同的動作。Theoldmansatunderthesunset,

reading

thenewspaperand

listening

totheradio.第二種句子模式：havingdone表現動作先后關系第2個例句，“沒有買到票”想一想：“買票”這個動作前面或后面會有哪些動作？

沒有買到票=

排了三小時隊+

被告知票賣完了

Havingqueued

for3hours,he

wastold

thatthetickethadbeensoldout.

第三種句子模式.-ed過去分詞凸顯被動

第3個例句，“孩子們哭了”

想一想：“哭”這個動作前面或后面會有哪些動作？或者因為什么原因讓孩子哭：孩子們哭了=被這個故事深深感動了，于是開始(setout)哭了(weep)

[wi?p]起來,并用手擦眼淚（wipe)

[wa?p]。Deeply

moved

bythestory,thechildrenset

out

toweep

,

wipingtheirtearswiththeirlittlehands.Part3

高考真題句中的動作鏈2016.10浙江卷1.她吃了一些漿果，然后沿著小溪走著，希望能找到一個合適的地方來引導直升機。Sheatesomeberriesandthenwalkedalongthestream,hopingtofindasuitableplacetoguidethehelicopter.2017.6浙江卷2.看到汽車消失了，麥克和他的朋友們騎上了自行車，繼續前往阿拉斯加。Seeingthecardisappear,MacandhisfriendsgotonthebicyclesandcontinuedheadingforAlaska.2017.6浙江卷3.他們跳下自行車，拿出隨身攜帶的刀，一寸一寸地走近狼。Theyjumpedofftheirbicycles,tookouttheknivestheyhadtakenwithandapproachedthewolfinchbyinch.2018.6浙江卷4.我和爸爸向群山走去（hat,horse，head)MydadandIputonournewcowboyhats,gotonourhorses,andheadedslowlytowardsthemountains.我和爸爸戴上新的牛仔帽，騎上馬，慢慢地向群山走去。2020.1浙江卷5.他擁抱著父母他站起來，擁抱著父母，微笑著，試圖不讓自己的情緒戰勝(getthebetterofsb.)他。Hestoodup,huggedhisparents,andsmiled,tryingnottolethisemotions(情緒)getthebetterofhim.續寫練習AGiftforGrandpaAGIFTFORGRANDPASummervacationwascoming.JackandhisbrotherBerlinwerefilledwithexcitementastheythoughtofvisitingtheirgrandparentsagain.Thebigdaycameatlast.Afterthehappyfamilygotready,theysetoutforthegrandparents'eagerly.Ontheway,thebrotherswereexcitedlytalkingaboutthefuntheyhadwithgrandparents.Alittlebluehousewithatallwhitechimneyfinallyappeared.BehindthepropertywastheforestcarryingtheirgoodmemorieswithGrandpa.Theyarrivedatthedriveway,attheendofwhichGrandmawaswaitingforthemjoyfully.JackandBerlineachgaveGrandmaabighugandthenswepttothelivingroom,shoutingexcitedly“Grandpa,weareback!”Seeinghisgrandsons,Grandpawaswildwithjoyandtriedtogetupwithallhisstrengthfromthechairbutinvain.Ahelplessexpressionflashedonhisface.Grandmaexplainedthathishealthwasdecliningrapidlyandmaybecouldn'tstanduponhisownforever.ButGrandpadeclaredstubbornly(倔強地),

“Ican!”Certainly,hewasstuckinhisboyishway.Mumandgrandparentswerehappytomeetagainafteralongtime.Theysattogetherandchattedaboutwhathappenedrecently.Thebrothersweresoonboredwithadultconversation,wentoutandwanderedintotheforest.Talltreesstretcheduptotheheavenswithlargebranchescrossingeachother,whileyoungonesrosestraightlikesoldiers.Grandpawasonceagreatexplorerfullofwisdom.Hecouldtellwherethebirdscamefromonlybytheircallsandsongs.Thetrees,birds,lizards,lotsofbugs...HowmanymerrymomentstheyspentwithGrandpainthekingdom!ButnowGrandpacouldn'tgetup.Thismadethemworried.“We'dthinkoutawaytocheerhimup.”Jacksaid.“Grandpaisabirdlover,andwecancatchhimabird.”Berlinsuggested.“Buthehatesbirdsbeingcaged!”Jackshookhishead.ThenabrightideacametoJack'smind.“Whynotmakeacane(拐杖)outofayoungtree!”Activity1:ReadforThemeandsixelementsThemeWhenWhereWhoWhatWhyLovefromkidsSummervacation

①：Grandparents'house②：theforestbehindthepropertyGrandpaJackBerilinJackandBerlinwantedtomakeacaneforGrandpatocheerGrandpaupHow？？？Activity2:ReadforPlotsandEmotions情節&情感beginningexpositionclimaxendresolutiondevelopmentexcitedTheGrandsonsvisitedGrandpainSummervacation

Grandpatriedtogetupbutinvain

joyfulbuthelplessGrandsonswentoutintotheforestandrecalledmerrymomentswithGrandpamerrybutworriedGrandsonsthoughtoutawaytocheerGrandpaup---makeacaneoutofayoungtreeinspiredBerlinthoughtitwasagoodidea.JackandBerlinhandedthecanetoGrandpa.??Activity3:ReadforCharacterAnalysis

人物性格分析GrandpaGrandsonslovingdeterminedexploringnature-lovingwiselovingdevotedcreativeconsiderateActivity4:RaisingthequestionsThenabrightideacametoJack'smind.“Whynotmakeacane(拐杖)outofayoungtree!”Para1：Berlinthoughtitwasagoodidea.寫作情節構思：

Hoedidtheycarryoutthegoodidea?Whatdidtheydonext?Howdidtheyfeelafterthat?Activity4:RaisingthequestionsPara2：JackandBerlinhandedthecanetoGrandpa.寫作情節構思：Howdidgrandpafeelafterseeingthecane?Didgrandpagetupfromthechairsuccessfully?Andhow?Activity5:WritingMaterials1.當他們選擇了一棵中等大小的小樹時，他們就把它砍倒，然后用刀砍掉樹枝和皮。Themomentthey______ayoungtreeofmoderatesize,they____________andthen__________________________withaknife.2.為了讓把手感覺舒適，他們用軟布包了起來。Tomakethehandlefeelcomfortable,they____________________aroundit.

制作拐杖小情節chosecutitdownremovedthebranchesandskins

wrappedasoftclothActivity5:WritingMaterials3.看著那根花哨的拐杖，爺爺高興極了，臉上的笑容像鉆石一樣閃閃發光。他滿懷深情地感謝孫子們的禮物。Staringatthefancycane,Grandpawassohappy________________________________________.Hethankedhisgrandsonsforthewonderfulgift_____________.

收到禮物與高興

withsmilesonhisfaceshininglikeadiamondwithaffectionSamples1

Berlinthoughtitwasagoodidea.TheysetaboutmakingacaneforGrandpaimmediately.Themomenttheychoseayoungtreeofmoderatesize,theycutitdownandthenremovedthebranchesandskinswithaknife.Withasmallwoodfastenedonthetopasahandle,afashionablecanecameintobeing.Tomakethehandlefeelcomfortable,theywrappedasoftclotharoundit.Berlin,fullofinnovativeideas,carvedwordsGiftToGrandpaonthecane.Whatacoolcane!

制作拐杖的動作鏈with復合結構表伴隨Samples1

JackandBerlinhandedthecanetoGrandpa.Staringatthefancycane,Grandpawassohappywithsmilesonhisfaceshininglikeadiamond.Hethankedhisgrandsonsforthewonderfulgiftwithaffection,“Youbrothersarereallygreatcreators!”Supportinghimselfwiththecane,Grandpacouldn'tcontainhimselfandwenttotheforeststepbystep.Watchingthetreesandgrassaround,heemotionallysaidhewouldforevercherishthefondmomentstheyweretogetherintheforest.高興的心理描寫拐杖發揮作用，爺爺來到森林場景復現，共同回憶甜蜜時刻Samples2

Berlinthoughtitwasagoodidea.

(銜接句1)Withthetoolsfetchedfromthebakdyard,theyreturnedtotheforesttosearchforanapproriateyoungtreeforacane.（準備工作）情節發展：Hardlyhadtheyselectedonewhen

theygetstartedwiththeirBIGPROJET.（迫切的心情）Jack,theelderbrother,tookonthejobofcuttingitdown,whileBerlin,whowasyoungerandmorecreative,wasresponbilefordecoration.（分工合作）Hardasitmightseemtothem,theyneverfailedtomakeit.（困難但不放棄）Afterwhatseemedalongtime,anelegantandtoughcaneappeared.（成功）

（銜接句2）Bothofthemweremorethansatisfiedwiththeirworkandcouldn'twaittorushhome.(沖到家+遞給爺爺)JackandBerlinhandedthecanetoGrandpa.Samples2

JackandBerlinhandedthecanetoGrandpa.（銜接句3）Theinstanthesawit,heknewwhatitwasallabout.（遞+看到+知道一切）情節發展：Deeplytouchedbythegrandsons'gift,hetookitwithgreatexcitement（語言協同心理描寫）andknockedonthegroundseveraltimes.（感動+激動+接過+試用）Obviously,heattemptedtostandupwithit.(拐杖應發揮作用+試圖站立)Withtheencouragementofthetwobrothers,hestruggledtogetup,rootedonthegroundlikeadeterminedsoldier（鼓勵+站立+修辭協同，比喻突出性格）.結尾句：Acheerfulandjoyfulexpression（語言協同心理描寫）,whichJackandBerlinhadexpectedoftheirGrandpa,flashedonhisface.（沖突解決）升華：Itwasatthatmomentth