1、1、good use of cry 哭的妙用the parents with their three-year-old son went to see film. when they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“youll have to go out if your son cries. but well refund you the tickets.” about half an hour later, the husband asked his wife, “what do you think of the fi

2、lm?”“ive never seen such a boring film.” his wife answered.“its not worth seeing.”“i dont think much of it, either.” the husband said. “wake the child up and let him cry.” 一對夫婦帶著他們3歲的兒子去看電影。進(jìn)電影院時，服務(wù)員對他們說：“如果你們的兒子哭了，你們就得出去。不過我們會給你們退票的?！贝蠹s半個小時以后，丈夫?qū)ζ拮诱f：“你覺得這電影怎么樣？”“我從沒看過這么沒勁的電影?！逼拮踊卮鹫f，“真不值得看?！薄拔乙膊幌矚g看。

3、”丈夫說：“叫醒孩子，讓他哭?！?、what a smart wife家有笨妻a newly married woman was sitting on a chair, looking vexed, when her husband came home. whats up? why do you look so troubled? the husband asked. the woman replied, im so sorry. i was ironing your new suit and burned a hole in your trousers. and the man said,

4、thats all right. i have another pair that is exactly the same. thank god you do. i used it to mend this pair,the wife responded. 有一個剛結(jié)婚的太太，坐在椅子那邊，看起來很懊惱，她先生回家看到她這個樣子，就問：嗨，你怎么啦？為什么看起來這么懊惱呢？太太說：很抱歉，你那件新做的西裝褲被我燙壞了，燙成一個洞了。他先生說：啊！那個沒關(guān)系啦！我還有另外一件一樣的褲子。她說：是啊，還好我把那件新的拿出來補那件被我燙壞的。3、endearing terms英語幽默故事:可愛的稱呼

5、bernie was invited to his friends home for dinner. morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her honey, my love, darling, sweetheart, etc. bernie looked at morris and remarked, that is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you

6、keep calling your wife those pet names. morris hung his head and whispered, to tell the truth, i forgot her name three years ago.bernie應(yīng)邀來到他的朋友morris家吃晚餐。在朋友家，bernie發(fā)現(xiàn)，不管問他老婆什么問題，morris總要在每句話的前面加上一些親密的稱呼，象蜜糖，我的愛人，親愛的，甜心等等。bernie對morris說，“你們夫妻倆真夠親密的，結(jié)婚這么多年了，你還叫她叫得那么親密。”morris低下頭，小聲地對bernie說，“老實跟你說吧，三

7、年前我忘記老婆的真名是什么了。”4、are you a normal person？你是正常人嗎？ during a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the director ., what is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized? well. said the director, we fill up a bathtub, and we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient a

8、nd ask him to empty the bathtub. oh, i understand, said the visitor. a normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup. noooooooo! answered the director. a normal person would pull the plug. 參觀一所精神病院的時候一個參觀者問院長，“你們是用什么標(biāo)準(zhǔn)來決定一個人是否應(yīng)該被關(guān)進(jìn)精神病院呢？” “呃 ”院長說，“是這樣，我們先給一個浴缸放滿水

9、，然后我們給病人一個調(diào)茶匙，一個茶杯和一個水桶去把浴缸里面的水放清。” “噢，我明白了”， 參觀者說。“一個正常人會選擇水桶， 因為水桶比茶匙，茶杯的體積大。” “錯了”，“院長回答”“正常人會把浴缸塞子拔掉”。 5、英文幽默老虎來了two guys were walking through the jungle. all of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them.one of the guys takes out a pair of nikes from his bag and starts to p

10、ut them on. the other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?his friend replies: i dont have to out run it, i just have to run faster than you.兩個男人正在穿過叢林，突然，一只老虎出現(xiàn)在遠(yuǎn)處，向他們沖來。其中的一個人從包里拿出一雙“耐克”鞋，開始穿上。另一個人驚奇地看著他說，“你以為穿上這個就可以跑得過老虎嗎？”他的朋友回答道：“我不用

11、跑得過它，我只要跑得比你快就行了?！?6、another 40 years to live再活40年 a middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. while on the operating table she had a near death experience. seeing god, she asked if this was it. god said, no you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live. upon reco

12、very the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. she even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. she got out of the hospital after t

13、he last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. arriving in front of god, she demanded, i thought you said i had another 40 years? god replied, i didnt recognize you.一名中年婦女心臟病突發(fā)被送到了醫(yī)院， 在手術(shù)臺上，瀕臨死亡之際，她看到了上帝， 于是，她問上帝是不是她的日子到頭了。 上帝回答說，“還沒有，你還能活43年，2個月

14、零8天。” 身體快要康復(fù)的時候，這名女士想到自己還要活那么多年，得好好對待自己，于是決定先不出院，而是去給自己整整容，吸吸脂，隆隆胸，然后還做了一個腹部拉皮和其它一些美容美體手術(shù)。 她甚至還請人到醫(yī)院里面幫她頭發(fā)給染了。 做完最后一個手術(shù)，這位女士出院了， 但就在過馬路的時候，她被一輛風(fēng)馳電摯趕回醫(yī)院的救護(hù)車給撞死了。 再一次，她又站到了上帝的面前，她大惑不解地問上帝，“我記得你說我還能再活40年？” 上帝回答，“那個時候我沒認(rèn)出你來”。 一、 before the final examination, tom told his mother, mom, i had a dream last

15、night that id passed todays exam.dont trust dreams, dear. it is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite. mother replied.then i do hope ill fail the other subjects in my dream tonight, tom said. 在期末考試之前，湯姆告訴他的母親：“媽媽，我昨天晚上做了一個夢，夢見我通過了今天的考試?！薄安灰嘈艍簦H愛的。據(jù)說夢中的經(jīng)歷通常與現(xiàn)實相反?！眿寢?/p>

16、答道?！澳敲?，我真希望在今晚的夢中，我的其他功課都不及格?！睖氛f。二、 the female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students and vice versa. anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. anybody caught breaking this rule the 2nd time will be fined $60. being caught a 3rd time will incur a fine of $18

17、0. are there any questions? at this moment, a male student in the crowd inquires, umm.how much for a season pass?女生宿舍將全面禁止男生進(jìn)入，男生宿舍也同樣不得女生光臨。不論是誰，一旦違規(guī)，初犯將被罰款20美元。再犯要被罰款60美元。第3次被抓需要交180美元的罰款。還有什么疑問么？這時人群中一個男同學(xué)問道，那么一個季度通行證需要多少錢？三、 where the declaration of independence was signed? teacher：“who knows wh

18、ere the declaration of in dependence was signed?” student：“i know，i know.at the bottom of the page.”獨立宣言是在哪兒簽字的？老師：“誰知道獨立宣言在哪兒簽字的？”學(xué)生：“我知道，我知道。是在那頁紙的底部?！彼?、 a father of five came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present, “who is the most obedient,

19、 never talks back to mother and does everything he or she is told?” he inquired. there was silence and then a chorus of voices: “you play with it, daddy!” 一個有五個孩子的父親帶著一件玩具回到家里，把孩子們召集來問這件禮物應(yīng)該給誰。“誰最聽話，從不和媽媽頂嘴，讓干什么就干什么？”他問道。大家都不吭聲。過了一會兒，孩子們異口同聲地說：“爸爸，您玩兒吧。”五、 wedding night, husband deep feeling of say

20、to the wife:dear of, i love you, i swear hereafter cant certainly do a sorry your business, if i do, certainly encountering for a day, the thunderclap splits, dont die a natural death!newly married but soon, the husband made a sorry cuckoldry matter. on the first, the husband goes out by boat, being

21、 the ship drove up to ocean middle, suddenly strong breeze your work, seeing the ship will sink right away, at this time, the husband towards the sky to scold a way loudlyold day, whether you becomes blind or not, i do a sorry cuckoldry matter, you let i a person die like, why harm so many innocent

22、peoples to also want to die.at this time, hears spread a deep and low voice in out of t he sky:you think i am all dry all day long what, i am very not easy to wait until today just chase your se people concentrated together!新婚之夜，丈夫深情的對妻子說：“親愛的，我愛你，我發(fā)誓以后一定不會做出對不起你的事，要是我做了，定遭天打雷劈，不得好死！”可是新婚不久，丈夫就作出了對不

23、起妻子的事。 一日，丈夫乘船外出，當(dāng)船駛到大海中間 時 ，突 然狂 風(fēng) 大作，眼看船 馬上就 要沉 沒了 ，這時， 丈 夫大 聲對著天空 罵道“ 老天 ，你是不是瞎了眼了，我做了對不起妻子的事，你讓我一個人去死就好了 ，為什么害 這么多無辜的人也要死啊?！?這時，只聽見半空中傳來一聲低沉的聲音：“你以為我整天都干什么啊，我好不容易等到今天才把你們這些人集中在一起來的！”六、 one day a college professor of psychology was greeting his new college class. he stood up in front of the class

24、 and said, would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up? after a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up. well, good morning. so, you actually think youre a moron? the professor asked. the kid replied, no sir, i just didnt want to see you standing there all by yourself.一天，一位大學(xué)

25、心理學(xué)教授向他的新生們問候。他站在學(xué)生們的面前說：“如果哪位同學(xué)認(rèn)為自己傻，就請站起來?！?大約過了一分鐘，一位年輕人站了起來。教授說：“嗨，你好。你真的認(rèn)為自己是個低能兒么？” 這個孩子回答道：“不是的，先生，我只是不忍心看著只有你自己站在這里。”七、 wipe glass father entered the sons room, praise, way: well done, son! the window and clean and bright, you are using soap water wipe? son: no, dad, i am using a sledgehamme

26、r.父親走進(jìn)兒子的房間，夸獎道：干得好，兒子！窗戶又干凈又明亮，你是用肥皂水擦的嗎？ 兒子：沒有，爸爸，我用的是錘子。八、 順便說一個：你可以對你的mm說我要測測你的英語反應(yīng)能力，伸出左手，對她說：“我點拇指是a，食指是c，中指是m，無名指是s,小指是x”，然后說，為了增加難度，我會用中文干擾你。然后，你指中指說魚，她會說m，你指無名指說驢，她會說s，然后在指拇指說豬，她會說a,然后一直點拇指說豬，她會一直說：a,a,a,a,a,a,如果mm聰明，可以多試其他的手指之后再說拇指。九、 問：26個字母去掉e和t還剩幾個字母？ 答：24個呀 問：錯！ 答：為什么呀？ 問：21個，因為et是坐ufo

27、走的十、 i wanted to look especially nice when i valked my son to his first day of kindergarten，so i took the liberty of borrowing an outfit from my younger，more fashionable sister，who was staying with us atthe time. we had agreed not to borrow from one another without asking，but she was asleep，so i sli

28、pped some shorts and a shirt out of her drawer silently，planning to put them back before she woke up.to my surprise .she was awake when i got back, but she didnt mention the clothes. we chatted about jasons introduction to kindergarten. finally，she smiled and asked coolly，and how did jasons teacher

29、like my pajamas?在陪兒 子上幼兒園的第一天，我想打扮一下自己。我打算從妹妹那兒借身外衣，她年徑而且時髦。妹妹和我 們住在一起。我們有 約在先，不經(jīng)過對方的同意不能拿 別人的東西。但那時她仍 在睡覺。于是，我從她的衣拒里輕徑拿走幾條短褲和一件村衣，本想趁她沒醒來時再放回去。讓我吃驚的是，當(dāng)我送兒子去幼兒園回來后，妹妹已經(jīng)醒了。但她沒說衣服的事兒。我們聊了聊兒子吉森在幼兒園做自我介紹的情況。最后，妹妹笑著并不動聲色地問:“吉森的老師覺得我的睡衣怎徉?”十一、 boy: id like to call you. whats your number? girl: its in the

30、phone book. boy: but i dont know your name. girl: thats in the phone book too. 男：我想給你打電話。你的電話號碼是多少？女：在電話本上呢。男：可是我不知道你的名字呀。女：也在電話本上呢。十二、 one summer evening during a violent thunderstorm1) a mother was tucking her small boy into bed.she was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor2) in

31、his voice，“mommy，will you sleep with me tonight ?”the mother smiled and gave him a reassuring3) hug. “i can t，dear.” she said.“i have to sleep in daddys room.”along silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice：“the big sissy4).”一個夏季的晚上，雷雨大作，母親讓小男孩上床鉆進(jìn)被窩。她正準(zhǔn)備熄燈，孩子聲音顫抖地問：“媽咪，你今晚可以陪我睡嗎?”母親笑著，擁抱

32、一下小孩安慰說，“親愛的，不可以。我得睡在爸爸的房間?！币魂囬L長的沉默之后，男孩小聲地用顫音說：“大膽小鬼。”十三、 two twins went to the kindergarten.“whos the elder and whos the younger one?” asked a nurse. one of them winked and said，“elder brother，dont tell her.”兩個雙胞胎走進(jìn)幼兒園。“你們兩個誰大誰小?”保育員問。其中的一個眨了眨眼睛說，“哥哥，不要告訴她?！笔?、 doctor：i can do nothing for your com

33、plaint. it is hereditary. patient：then send the bill to my father，please.醫(yī)生：對你的抱怨我無能為力。病人：那請你把賬單給我父親吧。十五、 miles sometime went to the barbers during working hours to have his hair cut. but this was against the office rules: clerks had to have their hair cut in their own time. while miles was at the b

34、arbers one day, the manager of the office came in by chance to have his own hair cut and sat just beside him.hello, miles, the manager said. i see that you are having your hair cut in office time.yes, sir, i am, admitted miles calmly. you see, sir, it grows in office time.not all of it, said the man

35、ager at once. some of it grows in your own time.yes, sir, thats quite true. answered miles politely, but im not having it all cut off.麥爾斯有時在上班時間去理發(fā)館理發(fā)，但這是違反辦公室規(guī)定的：職員只能利用自己的時間理發(fā)。一天，正當(dāng)麥爾斯理發(fā)時，經(jīng)理碰巧也進(jìn)來理發(fā)，而且就坐在他旁邊?！澳愫?，麥爾斯，”經(jīng)理說?！拔铱吹侥阍谏习鄷r間理發(fā)了?！薄笆堑?，先生。正是這樣?！丙湢査蛊届o地承認(rèn)了?？上壬?，你看，頭發(fā)是在上班時間長的。“不全都是吧，”經(jīng)理立刻說，“有一些是在你自己

36、的時間里長的?！薄皩ρ?，先生，你說得很對。”麥爾斯禮貌地回答說，“但我并沒有把頭發(fā)全都剪掉啊?！笔?、 palmist: the life line in your hand tells that you will die in a year. customer: good gracious! in a year? palmist: yes, but i cant say in which.手相大師：你手上的生命線顯示出你還有一年將會死去。顧客：天哪，一年后？手相大師：是的，可是我不能說是哪一年。十七、 if you refuse to marry me, he swore, i shall

37、die. she refused him. sixty years later, he died. 如果你不答應(yīng)嫁給我，他發(fā)誓，我就要去死。六十年后，他死了。十八、 policeman: why didnt you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch? man: if i had opened my mouth, theyd have found my four gold teeth. that would be much worse.警察：有人搶你的手表時，你為什么不呼救呢？男子：要是我張口的話，他們就會發(fā)現(xiàn)我的四顆金牙，那就更

38、糟了。十九、 i have his ear in my pocketi have his ear in my pocketivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, what happened?a kid bit me, replied ivan.would you recognize him if you saw him again? asked his mother.id know him any where, said ivan. i have his ear in my pocket.他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流著血回

39、到家里。他媽媽問，“發(fā)生了什么事？”“一個男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡說?！霸僖姷剿隳苷J(rèn)出來嗎？”媽媽問?！八叩侥睦镂叶寄苷J(rèn)出他，”伊凡說?！八亩溥€在我衣兜里呢。”二十、 teacher:why are you late for school every morning? tom:every time i come to the corner,a sign says,school-go slow.老師:為什么你每天早晨都遲到? 湯姆:每當(dāng)我經(jīng)過學(xué)校的拐角處,就看見一個牌子上寫著學(xué)校-慢行。二十一、 有個人剛學(xué)了點英語，就喜歡賣弄兩下。有一天他去商店想買一支鋼筆，對營業(yè)員說：“給我一個pen”

40、 營業(yè)員拿了個盆給他， 他說：“no”營業(yè)員說：“漏？哪有漏？新進(jìn)的貨”二十二、 有次房東問我did u eat anyting yet? 我說no.(沒吃) 她聽后重復(fù)了一遍so u didnt eat anyting. 我說yes.(吃了) 房東老太太猶豫了下，又問did u eat ?我說no.(沒吃) 她接著說so u didnt eat .我說yes .(吃了) 估計她當(dāng)時要崩潰了二十三、 it was rush hour and i was dashing to a train in new york citys grand central terminal - as i near

41、ed the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. her momentum carried her close to my shoes. before i could help her, however, she had scrambled up. gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, do you always hav

42、e beautiful women failing at your feet? 上下班高峰期,我匆匆奔向紐約豪華中心站去趕一趟火車.接近門口,一位肥胖的中年婦女從后面沖過來,沒想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了腳,仰面滑倒了.她的慣性使她接近了我的腳.我正準(zhǔn)備扶她,她卻自己爬了起來.她鎮(zhèn)定了一下,對我擠了一下眉,說道：“總是有漂亮女人拜倒在你腳下嗎?”二十四、 during the doctors periodic visit to my elderly mother, i told him that mother would be celebrating her 98th birthday in

43、few days. delighted by the news, he bent down and gave her a kiss for the occasion. he then announced that he, too, would be celebrating a birthday in few days and asked for a kiss in return.when he left, my mother shook her head in disgust. can you imagine, she said. seventy dollars and i had to ki

44、ss him too!醫(yī)生按期來探視我的老母。我告訴他母親不幾天就要慶祝她98歲的生日了。醫(yī)生聽了也很高興，為此，他彎下腰來親了她一下。然后他說不幾天他也要慶祝自己的生日，并要求她還他一個吻。醫(yī)生走后，我母親厭惡地?fù)u搖頭。“你能想象嗎，”她說，“付了他70元，我還得親他！”二十五、 一周七天英語怎么說星期一 【 忙day】； 星期二 【求死day】；星期三 【未死day】； 星期四 【受死day】； 星期五【福來day】； 星期六 【灑脫day】； 星期天【傷day】。二十六、 did the children behave when you bathed them? inquired the

45、 mistress to the new french nurse, when she returned home from the party. all but the biggest boy? we have only one boy, freddy, and hes only two years old. which biggest boy? we have only one boy, freddy, and he is only two years old. it is not little freddy, i mean. it is the big boy with glasses

46、and curly hair. good gracious! thats not my boy, thats my husband. “你給孩子們洗澡的時候他們規(guī)矩不規(guī)矩？” 一位女士從宴會回家后對一名法國護(hù)士詢問道。 “除了那個最大的男孩，其他表現(xiàn)都很好。在我把他放到水里之前，他又鬧又踹?！弊o(hù)士回答道。 “哪個最大的男孩？我們只有一個男孩，弗雷德，他只有兩歲?！?“不是小弗雷德，我是說那個戴著眼鏡卷頭發(fā)的大男孩。”“老天，那不是我的孩子，那是我丈夫?！倍摺?a sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of m

47、aking others glad. now, children, said she, has anyone of you ever made someone else glad?please, teacher, said a small boy, ive made someone glad yesterday.well done. who was that?my granny.good boy. now tell us how you made your grand mother glad.please, teacher, i went to see her yesterday, and s

48、tayed with her three hours. then i said to her, granny, im going home, and she said, well, im glad！一個主日學(xué)校的老師正在對學(xué)生講使別人高興的重要性。現(xiàn)在，孩子們，她說：你們當(dāng)中有誰讓別人高興過？我，老師，一個小男孩說：昨天我就使別人高興過。做得好，是誰 呢？我奶奶。好孩子，現(xiàn)在告訴我們，你是怎樣使你奶奶高興的。是這樣的，老師。我昨天去看她， 在她那兒呆了三個小 時。然后我跟她說：奶奶，我要 回家了。她說：啊 ，我很高興！二十八、 the absent-minded professor shout

49、ed: kate, come to the blackboard! another student says, kate is absent, professor. silent! let kate speak for herself.粗心的教授大聲地喊道：“凱特，到黑板前面來！”另外一個學(xué)生說：“教授，凱特沒來?！薄皠e出聲，讓凱特自己講?！倍?、 when the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerks hand was bandaged, but before he could ask about the band

50、age, the clerk said he had some very good news for him.guess what, sir? the clerk said. i finally sold that terrible, ugly suit weve had so long!do you mean that repulsive pink-and-blue double-*ed thing? the manager asked.thats the one!thats great! the manager cried, i thought wed never get rid of t

51、hat monstrosity! that had to be the ugliest suit weve ever had! but tell me.why is your hand bandaged?oh, the clerk replied, after i sold the guy that suit, his guide dog bit me.服裝店經(jīng) 理吃完午餐回來，發(fā)現(xiàn)店員的手包上了繃帶，沒等他問，店員告訴他一個非常好的消息。 “猜猜看 發(fā)生什么事了，經(jīng)理 ?！钡陠T說，“我終于把那套一直 壓在這兒的難看透頂?shù)奈?裝賣出去了！” “不是那件粉紅帶藍(lán)條的雙排扣套裝吧！那套衣服實在太可

52、怕了！” “就是那件?！?“太棒了！”經(jīng)理叫道，“我一直以為我們無法處理掉那件怪物了，那是我們有過最難看的西裝。對了，你的手怎么上繃帶了？” “哦，”店員說，“當(dāng)我把那件西裝賣給客人以后，他的導(dǎo)盲犬撲上來咬了我一口?！比?、 waiter, this lobster has only one claw. - im sorry, sir. it must have been in a fight. - well, bring me the winner then.服務(wù)員，這個龍蝦只有一只爪。對不起，先生，這只肯定打過架了。哦，那給我那個打贏的吧。三十一、 finding one of her s

53、tudents making faces at others on the playground, ms smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. smiling sweetly, the sunday school teacher said, bobby, when i was a child i was told if i made ugly faces, my face would freeze and stay like that. bobby looked up and replied, well, ms smith, you cant

54、 say you werent warned. 史密斯小姐發(fā)現(xiàn)她的一名學(xué)生在操場上向別人做鬼臉，便去輕責(zé)他。 這位主日學(xué)校的老師甜甜地微笑著，說：博比，我小的時候，有人告訴我如果我做鬼臉，我的臉就會僵硬，永遠(yuǎn)都那么丑。 博比抬頭看了看老師，說：史密斯小姐，你可別說沒人警告過你啊。三十二、 a father was trying to teach his son the evils of alcohol.he put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. the worm in the water

55、 lived, while the one in the whiskey curled up and died.all right, son, asked the father, what does that show you?well, dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms.一位父親打算讓自己的兒子知道酒精有多么可怕。他把分別把兩只蟲子放到一杯清水和一杯威士忌里做對比。清水里蟲子安然無恙，結(jié)果威士忌里的蟲子蜷縮了幾下就掛掉了。所以，兒子啊，父親問道，得出什么結(jié)論？恩，這說明，你只要喝酒的話，肚里就不會

56、長蟲了！三十三、 a lawyer opened the door of his bmw, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. when the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious bmw.officer, look what theyve done to my beeeemer!, he whined.you lawye

57、rs are so materialistic, you make me sick! retorted the officer, youre so worried about your stupid bmw, that you didnt even notice that your left arm was ripped off!律師、寶馬和胳膊一個律師打開他的寶馬車門，突然一輛汽車駛過來把門撞飛了，警察趕到現(xiàn)場，律師正痛苦地抱怨毀壞了他心愛的寶馬?！熬焱?，看看他們把我的車弄的!”律師哀怨地說。“你們律師真是物質(zhì)至上，我很不舒服!”警察反駁說，“你這么關(guān)心你可惡的寶馬，你可能沒有注意到你的左胳膊也沒了?！甭蓭熃K于注意到了血淋淋的左肩膀，“天哪，我的勞力士手表在哪兒?”三十四、 the multi-purpose fly swatter (originally in english) a mother came home from shopping for tea, and saw that some tea had already